Day 9 - Bali

Bali, with a population of 3 million, is the tourist jewel of Indonesia with an indigenous population of calm and caring Balinese and not so caring entrepreneurial Javanese that come to Bali for work with the tourists. Unlike most of Muslim -majority Indonesia, about 93% of Bali's population adheres to Balinese Hinduism. Minority religions include Islam (4.79%), Christianity (1.38%), and Buddhism (0.64%).

We anchored outside Benoa Harbour at Bali, as the harbour was too small at a distance similar to Sydney Heads to Circular Quay, and just as rough.

The ship had engaged the 300-person Bali Hai catamaran to speed up shore transfer but it was far too rough for the boat to dock with the ship so we endured a torturously slow, long and wet transfer ashore on ships lifeboats. Thankfully, I enjoy priority transfers so was on the second boat ashore leaving behind a growing queue of anxious passengers. 

Once ashore we were immediately lost in a sea of sellers of best quality fake teak, watches, silver and artwork. We fought our way to a taxi and, after turning on the air-conditioning, and bargaining our fare to half of the opening amount we headed to Kuta.

Kuta is not the best example of Balinese culture with more of a 24/7 Kings Cross flavour about it. Sukawasi, Ubud or even Lovina are far more interesting but a little far away for our one-day visit.

In the first few hours I bargained and bought the following:

·      Genuine fake Billabong shorts,

·      Genuine fake copies of the top ten movies on DVD at 10,000rp each (buy 10, get 4 free) and

·      A genuine bracelet made out of $2 coins with my name on it.

Then, I found my favourite massage parlour on Kuta beach and bargained for a full massage. In my experience a full massage is as much as you wish it to be. I requested a hard sports massage so only one of us disrobed and I limped out an hour later with nothing more on my mind than the pain, oh the pain!!

Later in the day I met up with many local friends from previous trips and even got recognised by the watch seller out the front of Bali Mandira Hotel four years since I last stayed there. Yeah, I bought a genuine fake Tag Heuer at a discount price for old times sake.

A quick visit to the Sukuwati Monkey Temple at Nusa Dua saw our day closing. We rushed to the Isatan Supermarket, bought some Listerine and Scotch, rinsed our mouths with the Listerine and poured out the rest replacing it with the Scotch (I learned this from an old lady in Darwin) and headed back to the dock. It was as bad as we thought, several hundred passengers huddled together being picked off at the edges by persistent sellers of Balinese bricabrac.

Each passenger had been given a numbered ticket to queue for the next available lifeboat; we noticed the sailors on the dock were not checking the tickets so we got on the next boat back to the ship (sneaky smile). The trip was wet and wild with three passengers splashing their partially digested spicy nasi goreng on the deck. I am sure I recognised a partially digested prawn!  We heard that the last passengers came aboard two hours after we should have lifted anchor.

It was so rough that the ship picked up three lifeboats on the starboard side then had to turn the whole ship around to protect the next three boats that came off the port side. We then had to turn around again to sail away.

What a great day in Bali, now on to Singapore with haste at a speedy 18 knots or 30 kph. Today is John’s birthday so party, party, party, Jammers here we come.

Day 7 & 8 At Sea heading for Bali

Darwin is on the fringe of Asia; we now sail on to what Australians may consider as the centre of Asia, Bali.

To set the scene, I am sitting in the Deck 5 Atrium coffee shop; the ocean is rushing past the water level bay windows; the 4-piece string quartet is amazingly, and beautifully, playing Elvis pop songs, and a loud American woman is sitting nearby telling all listeners that she isn’t going in to Paris, as it is full of “coloured people”. I think her accent is southern or at least her attitude is… otherwise a picture of relaxation.

Some days you leave your suite in the morning and don’t see it again until you return to dress for dinner, as you should. It is busier on the boat than a day at work so I thought I would share with you my typical day onboard. Some activities are focussed on engaging peoples’ personal hobbies but it has been fun having a go at new things.

6am – Run/walk/sweat on deck for 45 minutes (it’s now 35 degrees on deck)

7am – Gym for 30 minutes then quick shower. Ensure laundry bag ready for Steward before leaving suite. Formal Dinner tonight so leave out Tuxedo for pressing and shoes for cleaning.

7.30am – Breakfast – 4 courses

9am – Health Seminar – take control of your body, I might as well start!

10am – Line dancing lessons (getting ready for western night). I left early to jump into morning tea.

10.45am – Morning tea, only one plate of friandes today

11am  - Next Destination Seminar about what to do in the next port

12.00 – Margarita lesson and tasting

12.30pm – Lunch of 6 courses

1pm – Scrabble Challenge. I am in the top fifty so far but weakening. The Americans insist on challenging everything, crikey we’re on holidays.

2pm – Jackpot Bingo currently at $5000.00. I missed this as I was protecting my top 50 status at Scrabble.

2pm – Holy Rosary recited, not my cup of tea.

2pm – Passenger Choir Practice, wailing cats at midnight more like.

2pm – Deck Cricket, it’s a bit hot so I passed.

2pm – Ballroom Dancing Pasa Doble practice for the Grand Ball in a few days. I made the last half hour and caught up.

3pm – Car Racing on the big, big, big screen on deck. I am fourth highest score. The ships crew plug a PS3 games machine into the huge screen and we play PC games, YEAH!

3pm Diamonds of Russia lecture and discount purchasing. I passed on car racing today for this.

3pm Beginners Bridge lessons – I went the first time and found out that nearly everyone on board are Bridge Olympic Champions and only went to learn each others secret signals for team games. I was out of my league here so back to car racing.

3pm – Dr Bob Meeting (daily). It’s an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting timed to occur just before sunset Martinis’. They won’t catch me that easily…

3.30pm Afternoon Tea – now to make up for the cakes I missed this morning. Strangely, there is also a meeting of the “Ladies of the Red Hat Society” during afternoon tea. I could not pick any common trait or behaviour that shed any light on why red hated ladies seek solace with each other, and they weren’t wearing red hats. More on this later when I work it out.

4pm – Mah-jong Tournament with cash prizes

4pm – Central Coast Ressies Meeting with refreshments, come on down all central coast residents, this will confuse the Americans.

4pm – Tour de Spin Class (bike riding in the gym), nah! Not today

5pm to 7pm - Arcadia Harp Trio plays the ship into dinner. When they play I sit and listen in awe of their musical abilities.

6pm to 8.45pm – Dinner

8.45pm – Live Show a cast of about twenty singers and dancers

10pm – Jammers Night Club opens ALL NIGHT

As well as all of the above there are three pools, six spas’, lots of sun and a live band on deck all day. The Casino is open from 11am till dawn offering “cheap chips” lessons in all forms of gambling and so many coffee lounges you can hide in whenever it all gets overwhelming.

I have missed many other parallel activities but you get the picture, it’s as busy as you can manage or as lazy.  hooroo!

Darwin Dock looking towards the city

The white tent is the security area where you are checked on and off the ship.

Day 6 - Darwin

Today we landed in Darwin at 7am. The temperature is 31 degrees heading for 35 degrees at midday. The sky is blue, the horizon is shimmering with heat and the attractions of Darwin are calling.

224,800 people live in the Northern Territory. 114,368 of them live in Darwin. It is a small country town that coincidentally has major significance for the Australian economy in that it is a major Asian gateway for cargo into and out of Australia via the sea.

Darwin is a town closely connected with WW2. Twelve days after the Japanese took over Singapore in 1942, Japanese forces mounted air raids on Darwin led by the commander responsible for the attack on Pearl Harbour ten weeks earlier. The first raids killed at least 243 people and wounded 400.

More bombs were dropped on Darwin than Pearl Harbour!!

Contrary to widespread belief at the time, the attacks were not a precursor to an invasion but were meant to damage strong Australian morale the Japanese encountered in Singapore.

The attacks on Darwin continued until November 1943, by which time the Japanese had bombed Darwin 64 times including Townsville, Katherine, Wyndham, Derby, Broome and Port Hedland.

We spent a short time wandering the 3 or 4 main streets of Darwin and explored the one main shopping mall. Two thousand passengers invaded the local Coles store for alcohol, chips, alcohol, thongs, alcohol and other essentials to avoid paying one dollar more than they had to on the ship. The local Dick Smith store sold out of memory sticks for cameras and set up a help desk for bewildered passengers with new duty free complicated cameras. I did queue up to get some technical advice on backing up my MAC.

You could tell who was off the ship as most were still wearing their mandatory neck strap security/identity tags as they wandered through town.

I watched intrigued as one passenger poured a $2.99 bottle of excellent Australian red wine into the gutter of the main street. I asked what she was doing and then watched as she replaced the red wine with vodka. This was not the act of a 20yr old as you might stereotypically assume, remember that I am one of the youngest passengers on the ship. Ships policy is that wine can be taken on board but not spirits.

We then drove out to Lichfield National Park to the Florence Falls for a bit of tourism. Our GPS got us out there but ran out of battery coming back as our dodgy $40 per day hire car had a faulty cigarette lighter socket. Without technology we were lost in Arnhem Land. Using our Boy Scout skills, and the ratty tourist map in the glove box, we got back just as the ship was unfettering the gangway and earned a rebuke from the ships purser that he called “Strike 1”.

And we haven’t left Australia yet........

Day 5 – Rounding Cape York

We are still at sea, zooming along at 30kph. The wonders of the world are still in front of me so I will regale with some more of shipboard life.

The on deck movie, “Sherlock Holmes”, was excellent last night fed with a bottomless bucket of popcorn, free of course. At elevenish the Windjammers Nightclub opened promising a nightcap martini that would lull me into a good nights rest. I chose the James Bond Classic with some bell pepper stuffed olives. Some three hours and more than one martini later, I was almost the last man standing (they had walking frames) so I bid a goodnight to all and retired to my suite.

Now to the typical fare for a day onboard

Breakfast - Full ala Carte served on deck five

I started with fresh oats and prunes whilst waiting for the Eggs Benedict to be prepared. My selected Irish breakfast tea quietly aged in a nearby silver teapot. I resisted the warm morning pastries respecting my self imposed strict health regime that I intend to commence soon.  A more casual version of breakfast is also served buffet style with self-serve versions of much of the formal menu, seating on deck 14.

Morning Tea – I resisted the fresh sponge tartlets and gateaux served at ten each morning and stayed with my fresh apple. (you have to keep the eating under control)

Lunch – Deck 6 – Full ala Carte.

Fresh prawn cocktails with lemon myrtle dressing, complimented with lemon scented salmon fillet in a cabernet and fig essence. I could not resist the Drambuie Soufflé in pear sauce paired with a light grandfather port.

(Hamburgers, chips and pizza are available 24hrs a day at the Balcony Grill on deck for the less formally attired)

Afternoon Tea – Deck 5 Atrium

The violins have started wailing in the orchestra pit as high tea is wheeled out on ancient silver trolleys in the seven floor grand atrium of the ship. Despite the profligate offering I kept to the cucumber and French orange sandwiches with a cinnamon and lime tea. I must admit that I felt a bit self-conscious in my board shorts and best old T-shirt. Looking around at the many colours and heights of permed hair I felt an overwhelming urge to reach for some hair gel but as I had not shaved today, more would be needed to reach any acceptable level of grooming. With a few sandwiches in hand I retreated to the pool deck.

Dinner – Florentine Dining Room – Fine Dining

Blue crab cakes in Panko coating with Romesco sauce started the night. Chilled Yoghurt and Tamarind Soup led me to the main course that was a modest Steamed Butterfish in roasted garlic sauce garnished with Honey Tiger Prawns.

I settled on a small serving of Cream Cheese and Butterscotch Gateau with Marsala Sabayon.

The pattern of food delivery is similar every day just the titles change. I appreciate that this is an attraction of cruising but I have seen some eye brow raising eating habits already manifesting such as the woman who eats two bratwurst for lunch and puts three in her handbag, I assume as a snack between lunch and afternoon tea.  This afternoon I am going to investigate the opening hours of the gym, just in case my eating gets out of control

Formal Night with Friends & excellent champagne

Day 4 – Off the Great Barrier Reef

The sun is shining, the temperature is approaching memories of last summer, the spas’ are bubbling, the martinis’ are flowing and there is nothing better to do than a game of putt-putt golf with the main pool as a water hazard. First prize was a well thought out credit at the nearest bar.

Another pastime that is quickly forming as an evening ritual is the evening movie on deck. This allows for some relief from the still relentless polite bonding conversations as you pass fellow passengers:

“Where are you from?”

“Is this your first cruise?”

“Are you going all the way round?”

“Do you have a balcony cabin?”

 Sitting in my deck chair wrapped in a blanket, martini ordered, and free popcorn in hand, the latest movies play on the largest screen I have ever seen all under the stars.

Tomorrow I will give an example of a typical days’ food offered on board

Day 3 – Off Brisbane

As the violin quartet caressed classical tunes into the night we began the inevitable introductions and bonding whilst sailing ever northward. This is an important ritual where you are measured and placed in your social class determined by the number of cruises you have completed. Many conversations began with: “This is my 26^th cruise, do you like large ship or small ship sailing?” Common ground was often found in your ability to name at least ten other cruise ships and the size of their cabins.

Tonight, like Cinderella to the ball, we all got dressed up (Tuxedos & Evening Gowns) and celebrated our good fortune by pouring champagne over a tower of glasses in the grand foyer of the ship, a very adult pastime. My attempts to confirm that the champagne was genuine methode’ champenoise and not a cheap carbonated copy were stonewalled by waiters constantly refilling my glass and not allowing me to see the white linen wrapped bottles. Several glasses later my cause was happily lost in a sea of bubbles.

Day 2 – Up the Coast of NSW

We are at sea cruising our way up the Australian coastline, heading for Darwin. I offer a monologue on shipboard life to set the scene. There are the older, not so old and younger passengers on board. The older passengers are to be found in games rooms, coffee shops and immersed in books on deck chairs. The not so old are to be found in the gym, fast walking on deck and sunning at the pool. The younger passengers are in fact members of the first two groups who are lying about their age. This is a world cruise and has attracted an older group of people.

Do not be put off cruising at this point as it is completely the opposite passenger makeup if on a shorter cruise where much younger people dominate the decks.

We are really happy with the passenger mix as the pools are largely empty and the gym equipment is not used for more than five minutes at a time. The only downside so far is very slow entry and exit to lifts and pushing every floor button citing that they did not bring their glasses!

We are roaring along at an average speed of 18 knots (30kph) and we arrive in Darwin at dawn on Thursday, crikey. Talk about going “cold turkey” on stress. There is a huge gap between the physical and mental stresses of work and the stress of which martini to choose to have served to you, in which spa, on which deck. Apple & lychee is now my preferred martini, shaken not stirred of course.

-2 days Sydney

My passport has been found by the Egyptian Consulate so once again I am good to go. There was much angst during the "lost' period. My new priority is what to pack! Lots of miscellaneous drugs, of the preventative medicinal variety (mostly), and a substantial wardrobe suitable for travel on the continent. Various electronic distractions such as IPOD, phone, Apple MAC, ripped DVD's and I am ready to see the world depending on which movie I watch.

That should do it.

-9 days Sydney

Oh my God! my passport is lost in the mail. The Egyptian Consulate mailed it but it never arrived. Australia Post won't look until it is missing for 28 days and the Consulate says it is not their problem. i am now chasing a new passport, without visa's just to get on the boat.

Am I excited? get real. I am exhausted, angry, and looking up my insurance policy for cancelled cruise tickets........ Oh my God!

-12 days Sydney

Well everyone, I am so stressed getting ready for the trip that I have not begun to get excited. Thank you to Jarrod for helping set up this site. I hope it all works on the day. As the internet only works in sight of land I will add new photos and posts every few days.

You can respond with comments at the end of each post but will need to create a temporary GOOGLE account and password (no pain). GMAIL logins also work.